Before. After. Always. by Morgan Lee Miller

Potential not seen through

I picked this book up as I absolutely loved the previous book I read by this author. And this book had so much potential! The beginning of this book had me hooked yet, somehow along the way, I started to be less engaged. By the end, instead of feeling elated at the immense HEA, I just felt disappointed.

I’m unsure what went wrong. I mean, long-term effects of PTSD is a thing and therapy doesn’t always help with completely taking away the anxiety and panic attacks, although it should help in easing them. Especially after a certain amount of time has passed. Eliza most definitely doesn’t have CPTSD (Complex PTSD), as that, as its name suggest, is a far more severe form of PTSD, caused by years of repeated trauma in childhood. Yet Eliza has never moved on from a severely traumatic event when she was eighteen (now being thirty-one). She’s achieved so much, is accomplished in so many ways, yet part of her is still stuck in the past. It is certainly possible, but for someone who is so strong in other ways, it’s not necessarily a hundred-percent believable. It’s not to say that otherwise strong and accomplished people do not have panic attacks and suffer from anxiety, but long-term PTSD is usually so debilitating that it prevents you from pushing yourself as much as you otherwise would, strong or not.

Then there’s Blake, broken in her own ways, still sore after losing her brother. She just gets on with things, only breaking down at the anniversary of his death. Yet she is still hung up about a bad breakup with a long-term girlfriend, from about the same time ago as Eliza. Blake has had a few short-term flings, but nothing serious in recent years, happy with that even if she does eventually want more. Eliza has barely dated at all since the accident, just going through the motions a few times hoping to find a spark.

How these two come together, through the understanding of loss, is cute. And when they eventually decide to call each other their “girlfriend”, that’s cute too. Yet their strange bout of miscommunication, not understanding each other, that wasn’t. Every relationship goes through it at some point, yet it was the lack of communication between the two that left me banging my head. They’re both stuck in their own world with their own fears, and neither wants to tell the painful truth of why they’re hurt. It takes yet another traumatic event to bring the two back together again.

I guess that parts of the story felt slow. Other parts felt predictable. Then there were little bits of repetition. Tension is good, but even the tense parts didn’t feel tense enough. I still had moments of rooting for both of them, with their slow progress towards going further in their relationship, yet something was still missing. I wish I could be less vague, but sometimes a book just doesn’t click.

All in all, not a bad read, but not as great as I was hoping.

Final rating: ★★★☆☆ – Sort of liked/OK

*I received a free digital ARC via NetGalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review.*

Dead Silence by Robin Caroll

Christian political suspense

I should have paid more attention when picking this book up, that it was listed as Christian fiction, as I know that I have many problems with that. In fact, this book could also be surmised as “Mother of deaf child works her way back to God through additional trials and tribulations.” Yes, the substory was essentially that, which I felt a little uncomfortable with. It wasn’t too preachy, surprisingly, but as soon as a book goes into that sort of territory, I do hope that it’s not going to go too far.

But the main thing that invited me to read this book was actually the fact that the MC’s son is deaf. Sign language, lip reading, and deafness aren’t huge topics for a mystery suspense, so I liked the idea.

So, anyway, as for the main part of the story itself, we have a single mother, who lost her husband a few years previously, who now loses her difficult mother-in-law. She can sign and lipread, making her great as a court sign-language interpreter. But it also puts her into other difficult territory, when she reads the lips of someone without thinking, who turns out to be planning the murder of her mother-in-law, one of the state senators.

Well, of course, something comes in the way, so she can’t inform anyone, until it’s too late and the FBI are already at her workplace asking her questions. One FBI agent, who’s rude, abrasive, and incompetent. Another who is well meaning, but completely blind to how bad his partner actually is. When a leak puts Elise’s life in danger, all secrets are excruciatingly slowly forced out into the open.

In actual fact, it takes Elise herself, plus the assistance of a reporter who wants to help rather than going for the big money, and her ex-press step-father-in-law and sister-in-law, to crack the case. They somehow, between themselves, manage to uncover things that the FBI hasn’t.

How believable all of that truly is, I’m not quite sure. It was quite a ride, which left me wanting to read further at many points. Although it was pretty frustrating when it was revealed what Liliana (MiL) was actually working on and the penny didn’t even drop as to who the villain actually was. For me, it was blazingly obvious! So with the Christian elements, the FBI incompetence, and the supposedly ‘good sleuthing crew’ missing obvious clues, there were a few head bashing moments.

All of it put together, and it ends up as an OK read instead of a brilliant one. I don’t regret reading it, yet it doesn’t warm me to read any of the author’s other books.

Final rating: ★★★☆☆ – Sort of liked/OK

*I received a free digital ARC via NetGalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review.*

Join or Die by J. Adrian Ruth

The race to save Otherworld

This book is initially set in the human realm, before Alex suddenly receives a visitor who tells him that his absentee father is a “Creature”, the various monsters out of myths and legends, and that he most likely will transform into one, too.

So there Alex is, a half breed with a human mother, suddenly taken away to a private boarding school for Creatures in another realm, Otherworld, leaving behind his best friend, Carlos, his mother, and everything he’s ever known. Worse than that, he’s told that he’s the Scion Heir (leader of all the Creatures), being a descendant of the original Scion, and that he’ll eventually have to battle the other Heir to become the leader of all.

Luckily, he somehow manages to find his place in this new world, making new friends who gradually form a part of his Ciorcal (Celtic for “circle”), the group that will support, protect, and guide him, if and when he does fulfil his destiny.

In the meantime, however, he has no idea what Creature he himself is going to be, and has to face off a Creature who has been killing off all of the Heirs. Along with some other hijinks with his Ciorcal, it’s a fight for survival he hadn’t been warned of or planned for.

I must say that the beginning didn’t thrill me quite so much, but the last part of the book made up for that and was pretty good. I can only assume that this is because this is quite obviously the author’s first book, with it having at times too much information, then at others not enough. There are still quite a few typos in this book, but I’m guessing that that is because it is, at the time of ARC release, still not fully edited.

However, despite its similarities to other Paranormal schools, it has enough differences in it to make it a new take on the idea, somewhat familiar yet with unique elements.

Hopefully the sequel, once it’s finally released, will further develop the ideas here and, after reading the preview, it looks like we will find out more about the current Scion and the ongoing war against him.

Final rating: ★★★★☆ – Really liked

*I received a free digital ARC via NetGalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review.*

Pursuing Pandora by Maggie Brown

A not-to-be-missed romance-come-mystery

This book was quite delightful, in so many ways. We have sultry Pandora, who isn’t at all what she seems. Recently burnt Winter, who is happy to finally be able to move on from her controlling ex. Then Winter’s array of family and friends, some who really don’t appear to have her best interests at heart.

Winter ends up meeting Pandora after her aunt cajoles her into going to an upscale nightclub to check on her nephew, who insists he’s going to marry Pandora. Only problem is, instead of disliking her, Winter is attracted to her. As is her best friend, Jessie. Although Winter assumes that Pandora wouldn’t be interested in her, noting all the male attention she gets at the club. Oh how wrong could she be!

So, she gets to know Pandora, whilst setting up a trap for her nephew, unfortunately involving Jessie. Now, will everything go to plan there?

And of course, the intelligent Winter is able to discover some of Pandora’s secrets. Yet whether it will all be too much for both of them, when Pandora finally has to move on, is a secret that I’m not revealing.

Sometimes it’s quite frustrating finding out the details as I go along, rather than them being laid bare from the beginning, yet in this instance, it worked quite well. The only thing I will say that I disliked was how mean both Winter’s aunt and Jessie were to her! Considering how badly Winter was treated by her ex, I had expected better treatment from her family and friends.

Anyway, it’s still a worthwhile read. And also really nice to experience a little bit of Australia as a change!

Final rating: ★★★★☆ – Really liked

*I received a free digital ARC via NetGalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review.*

The Englisch Daughter by Cindy Woodsmall and Erin Woodsmall

Fighting against the odds

Now this is exactly what I wanted from a religious book – an overview of the religion and culture, without preaching to me (this comment is because of having recently been burnt with that).

I haven’t actually read any Amish books before this, so I didn’t know what to expect at all. I have a vague idea of who they are, from various TV shows, but I didn’t know the difference between the different types of Amish or, indeed, the Mennonites, or even the language they spoke. This book is filled with their version of German, “Pennsylvania Dutch” (which is far more a German dialect and not even related to Dutch!). I actually wish that I had realised that there was a glossary at the back, with a direct translation of the sentences, before I started reading! Although each time, particularly with the children, that they spoke in their form of butchered German, there was an explanation as part of the story.

This is actually quite a heart-warming story. The Amish are highly religious, and opposed to all forms of violence. The women, once married, lose their independence and everything they have belongs to their husband. They are also expected to forgive any transgressions both publicly and easily. All of this, even for the highly religious women, is harder than it sounds. Especially when all the lies and deceit land on their own doorstep.

Yet love truly does conquer all. Through hardship and rebuilding the trust, if love is there, then it can overcome just about anything. The resilience that Jemima shows when she realises that her husband, Roy, has been not only distant, but uncovers that he’s been lying to her, is remarkable. Of course she is angry! Yet her love eventually brings her around once all the lies and deceit are unravelled.

There is a side story here, with Chris, who is going against his religion and culture by fighting, and Abigail, Roy’s sister, who has also gone against her culture by turning down many a potential partner as she prefers being on her own. She doesn’t want to get lost, like she’s seen so many other women do. And even with her connection with Chris, she finds yet another excuse to push him away. Of course, there is a happy ending here as well, which also isn’t hard won.

With the horse farm in the background, to provide an even more traditional setting, things are never as they seem. They fight to keep everything, when everything should be lost. And they do it all with an amazing strength where others would have failed.

All in all, a great and surprising read, that draws you in to another world.

Final rating: ★★★★☆ – Really liked

*I received a free digital ARC via NetGalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review.*